Oh the places you will go...
yeah thats one of my favorite Dr. Suess books. And we have all been to places haven't we? we have been to more places, seen more things and experienced more life than most generations before us...but some of the places we go have nothing to do with far off travel or exotic adventure... no, they are places that you and i have all been to and we may share some similar observations....
1) Your Local Christian Bookstore:
From the minute you walk in you feel like everyone is watching you...but i guess that should be expected from a "christian" store. Even the customers are looking at you...are they waiting for me to say something christian? Is this some exclusive club where i have to memorize a password in order to peruse the merchandise? "well glory to god" ...everyone who was starring is like, ok he is good...he's one of us. Now the good stores are full of christian trinkets...little doo dads and bells and frames and all sorts of things...(that rhymed) They have everything you could possibly imagine with some christian saying on it...Like i need a WWJD nail polish remover. But if i did they would prob have it. The very best CBS's (christian book stores) are even supplying the holy sacrament...that is the lords supper. They have the little shots of grape juice and the bread or Jesits as i like to call them. (d. c.) Everything you would need in order to be a christian...a christian supply store is what they are. From your clothing to your music, to your low budget movies to breathmints (spirit ments) they have it all. if you have never darkened the doors then suggest you make this on of the places you will go very soon.
2) Tattoo Parlor:
If you have never been to one of these places then i would suggest you go just for the experience of it...im not advocating nor knocking tattoos but its the establishment where these things are sold that's what is noteworthy. I believe that a tattoo parlor is the only place in the world where you can look through the pictures on the wall and see the most reverent pictures of Jesus and the cross or a trinity symbol or a crown of thorns...NEXT to a scantily clad woman riding a bumble bee. You look at one page of the most degrading pictures imaginable next to a pair of folded hands with nail scares on them...I think the most ridiculous picture i have ever seen was in Gaston Co. and it was a picture of Jesus wrapped up in a rebel flag. I am not kidding! But im glad to know that some body in G-town thinks that Jesus is a racist.
3) Your Grandparent's House
This is one of those places that you will go and it will always be the same everytime for everybody. You walk in and there is that smell. Not a bad smell, just an old house smell. You look around and all the furniture is the same....it was bought in the year 1973 and has not changed since then. There is a good chance that the tv will either be on the weather channel or TBN. You look at the frig and you see that they have updated everyone's picture; your cousins, aunts, uncles, nieces and nephews...everyone but you....they still have your picture from about 13 yrs ago. They are not mad at you but they just did not forget about the fact that you didn't call them on their birthday 6 yrs ago...and its their way of exercising power...they are the keeper of the frig pictures and you will get updated as soon as you call or do something to make up for you negligence 6 yrs ago. But i think we can all agree that this is one of those places that we love to go and want to for as long as possible.
posted by hansen @ 2:19 PM
13 Comments:
tatoo parlor is also one of those places that when you walk in ...you have people of every kind:
straight-laced
conservative
wild
goth
redneck
ghetto
wealthy
surfer
poor
it doesn't matter what point of life you come from...there is ALL ages getting them....all religions...males/females....
it's almost like a church...all welcome...cause you all want the same thing...a tattoo
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yes candice, and some people talk about getting tattoo's and the never do...hmmmm ;-)
"little doo dads and bells and frames and all sorts of things...(that rhymed)"
"But im glad to know that some body in G-town thinks that Jesus is a racist."
my favorite lol lines.
i know what u mean about people watching you in the bookstore like if you're looking at soundtracks they expect you to bust out in song at any point.
Dang....Leah beat me to it. You CAN'T forget the testamints.
What's really bad about the Christian store thing is when you go to the soundtrack section trying to buy something and you hear some girl/guy who should have made it on the American Idol BLOOPER video. They can't sing. I want to walk up to them and say, "Hey, have you ever thought about teaching a Sunday School class or something.......sorry baby.....music ain't your thang!
I will say this though. I found some of the BEST chocolates I have EVER had in my life at a christian book store. They had Bible verses on them. I put one in my mouth and I SWEAR I heard the angels singing. I'm not sure if the singing was for the verse or the chocolate? Regardless, my mouth said, Halleloooooojhah!
oh hansen...give me a break :)
bird- stop that...you are not serious
candice- i will give you a break when you get ink, not sharpie
erin- yes walmart...oh the places you will go and go and go again
brian- you know that you are over there singing with them
LOL
good stuff man
Stex,
Yes, unfortunately, Kelly Pickler is still on. I don't really like her but she made it in the top 12. Drop me a line and let me know what you're up to these days.
hanson you are too funny!
im a huge kelly pickler fan!!!
Where's an update? I'm waiting. Don't leave me man!
read my blog-i answered you:)
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