Boy named sue...
in case you have been living under a rock for the eniriety of your life, i'll take the time to explain the title....Boy Named Sue: written by johnny cash, song about an absentee father who left home and named his son "sue" in an attempt to make him tough.now that we are all up to speed i feel that i share some struggles with this sue. not just in name but also being from Ga, we have a different accent, not just southern, its different...you Ga people know what im talking about (remember Ace from real world france?...he and my brother and i played varsity basketball together in highschool...remember his accent?...it was a Ga. accent, very distinct)
ok...so take my name (hansen, usually a last name, not given name) and my accent...put them together and i could pose a slight communication problem for some people...for example:
-paying a bill over the phone:
ever notice how most businesses make a concerted effort to hire people who dont have the best handle on the english language to receive the over the phone payments...it like they do it on purpose just so they can set you up on a draft plan..."lets hire abdulio to talk to our customers so that they will have to let us draft their bank accounts...they would rather shove bamboo shoots under their fingernails then to try to make an over the phone payment." and that is just with normal speaking people with normal names...imagine my frustration...
-ordering chinese food for pickup
there are only a few things in life that make me want to throw my phone through a wall...this is one of them..."sir, what chu lika orda" um, yeah, lemme get that uh...sweet and sour chicken, no wait...lemme get that seseme chicken, " chu lika sweet sour?", no, i want the seseme, "dat all?" um, does that come with an eggroll?, "no dat extra sir, chu lika egg roll?" it dont come with the lunch special?, "chu lika lunch special sir?" yeah, i guess, how much is that? "eggroll 1 dolla extra sir" ...no how much is the special with an eggroll? "chu lika lunch special sir? it 4 9 7" ...so that includes the eggroll?... "eggroll extra, chu lika eggroll, 1 dolla" ....yeah, whatever, thats fine...lemme get the seseme chicken lunch special with a eggroll... " k sir dat 7 95" ...what, i thought the eggroll is only a dollar... " chu order lagre, cost more" ...fine , that s fine...when do i pick it up?..." ten min, your name sir?" Hansen,... "Chanseey" ...no Hansen,... " Shanset?" ...no its HANSEN... "ok Pansent, you order ready in 10 minut bye bye" ....and at this point im just shaking and about to cry....this happens every time i order chinese food.
-the introduction
im a fairly outgoing person so i tend to meet new people with some regularity...all i say is Hey, Im Hansen...thats when the cutesy comments begin...oh i thought you said handsome, well are'nt you conceited...No actually im not, but i do appreciate your ability to come up with a quip that for some reason i have never heard before...thats amazing, how did you come up with that? very clever. or my favorite, "oh you mean like the group? Hanson? ...now which one are you....the tall one?, did you get your hair cut?" ....oh i see....you are making a reference to a pop group thats about 6 yrs. old...care to make any jokes about the movie titiantic while you are using old material....just a thought.
posted by hansen @ 10:28 AM
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