i before e except after c...
now if you recall that little grammar rule then i might be inclined to be impressed...dont worry, not that im teaching im not making this a teacher blog...however i do think that there are some grammar / speech rules that have either been forgotten or maybe just covered up with laziness and idiocy ....let s take a look at a few of these...1) The Double Couple Meaning problem:
I was pumping gas the other day and went inside to pay and told the cashier that id like a "couple" packs of advil...to which she so redneckly responded...well how many do you want?...to which i respond ...A "Couple." ...to which she responds...." i know, but how many?"....to which im thinking..." hmm...no you obviously dont" know" cause if you did you would know that a "couple" always in every circumstance based on the definition in websters dictionary MEANS.....drumroll please.....................................TWO! and ONLY TWO. When i say couple you moron, im telling you the NUMBER of advil that i want." however i didnt say what i was think but i did respond with a smirk and say " a couple means two..so i'll take two advil." This is not the first time nor i doubt it is the last time ill have to stand up and defend the honor or the meaning of the word couple.
2) I lost my drivers license, can you help me find THEM? :
do what? im sorry, do you have more that one license because i could have swore that you said THEM when you were talking about your personal drivers license...??? i love north carolina but for some reason people up here refer to their ONE license in the plural. "Do you have your license, let me look at your picture." NC answer- " No i left THEM in the car." AUGHH. Unless you have like 2 or 3 different pieces of plastic that are called your license, then stop referring to that one piece of plastic as THEM.
3) Medically Speaking...
Recently i was in the hospital waiting to hear back about a family member and the Dr. comes out and talks for a little bit about whats going on and then in the middle of if all he says...."Medically speaking, i feel like this is the best course of action for the patient." Im thinking...hmm, medically speaking you say...well you did a lot of speaking before you came out with "medically speaking" so was all that other banter some kind of "willy wonka land" speaking. when you are a doctor and you are in a hospital and you are talking about my family member everything you say better be medically speaking! you dont have to qualify it by saying "medically speaking." That also goes for those LIARS who say "honestly" or "to tell you the truth." If you were being honest with me during the entirety of our conversation then why did you have to let me know that this next thing you are going to say is extra true....no most of the time people who say that a lot are people who are liars. It is their sub conscience leaking through or something. All that being said...Just tell me the truth when you speak to me and stop phrasing it with Technically speaking, or Honestly or Medically speaking or whatever . If you need those verbal crutches to qualify or enhance your conversation then most likely you have nothing i want to hear in the first place.
posted by hansen @ 12:25 PM
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