sweet!

My Family.

There is a shift that takes place in the mid 20's. It usually a shift from being in the family to starting your own family. All you married folks out there in radio land can attest to that. But for us who are still single as a can of pringles, in some ways our family's are all we really have. I have friends, fun, toys, social life, work, school, goals, and bills, but all i really have is my family.

For those of you who really know me this will mean a lot more but for those of you who are just acquainted or just blog readers then this will be some interesting insight into the most unique family that i know. Not to say that your family is not special...they may be, they may not be, i don't know but i do know that mine is and its worth writing about.

In an attempt to stay true to my form I'll break this thing down in categories. Each of us have our own little things that we bring to the table of fellowship. For example:

The father:
Deddy (yes that's how i spell it, you wanna fight about it?) is the best man i know of. He's not perfect but as far as im concerned he is the best dad i could have. Its so funny to me how diverse he is. He is as country and southern as one could be but he has a double major in math and computer science. He has forgotten more about computers programming that most of us could ever know. But when he gets home from writing programming language all day he would be just happy to sit in a deer stand till dark. For example, this Christmas he wants Home Depot/Walmart gift cards and an Ipod Nano. That makes me laugh. He is the most logical thinker i have ever met but can turn right around and tell a joke so corny or do something so silly that you want to just shake your head. At 53 yrs old
deddy is an ironman triathalete. (2.4mile swim, 112mile bike, 26.2 mile run) There are two people in this world that i would never want to get in a fight with....Nate Marriner and my Dad. They would both whip me like little girl. Deddy loves God and he loves Mama and us and i love him back.

The Mother
Mama is the sweetest woman alive. She could sweeten tea by just stirring it with her finger. She always knows what to say. She is a true Proverbs 31 woman. When i come in to visit i usually get in real late and she always stays up to greet me and then we sit up and talk for hours. She always has the softest hands. When i meet a girl i look at her hands to see if they are soft like mamma's...if not then that girl don't even get my area code. She makes the best potato salad. I know that everyone says that about their moms cooking but everyone is wrong. Even though her husband and two sons are ironmen i think she is stronger than all of us. She cant bake cookies very good. But that's ok. She has the cutest little short hair cut. She is worried about some gray hairs but its not that bad. She likes to cut grass on a riding lawn mower. One time we were all out in the yard and she was on the mower and deddy tossed a tennis ball at her and it scared her...so she waved at him with out using all her fingers, just the one in the middle. She prays often for me and my family. I love her a bunch.

The Brother
I love my brother. He is smarter than me. But im taller than him. We go back and forth in all sports to see who is better. He could have played basketball and tennis in college if he wanted to like i did but it didn't work out. He is a computer wiz like my dad and the only other person who thinks like i do about almost every topic. Hes not real loud and zany , that's where i come in, but one of the funniest people i know. He has a strong work ethic and is not lazy. He is also an ironman. One time when we were kids i made him so mad on purpose that when he told mama what i did he said, "hansen makes me so d%mn mad." He got a spanking for that even though i started it. Now days we go home and sit around the fire at night out in the yard and talk and cut up for hrs. We make each other laugh pretty hard.

The Sis-n-Law
Amy fits into our family just right...She brings her own personality and wit to the table. She is very spunky and smart. She and my mom are both school teachers so they get along really good. Amy has a big heart and love people. She is only 5' 2" on a good day...so she fits right in with my brother who is 6' 3" and myself at 6'7". But for some reason i don't think she is scared at all. I love amy and am very excited that she is my sis n law. Plus she helps me Christmas shop for my brother...not that i don't know what to get him cause we like the same stuff

All in all i just love it when i get to be with all of them together...its better that a week vacation in the Bahamas and i don't know that many people can say that about their family's...maybe so but i know i can.

posted by hansen @ 7:38 AM 9 comments

1992 called...

and said that they wanted their shirt back.

That's what i told a 4th grader at camp who was sporting a tye dye shirt. Dont worry, he didnt get it, nor was he offended but inside i had to chuckle cause i knew that little quip was right on the money.

Okay, okay...that was a little mean...
It's not a habit of mine to pick on kids about their clothing nor do not consider myself some sort of fashion guru but i think that i have a decent handle on what is semi fashionable and what is not and that there should be some simple guidelines for one's dress/attire out in a public venue.

1) Stretch Pants:
What a wonderful invention. A material that can stretch so it fits smoother to your body...not so much. Stretch Pants/shirts/whatever are great if the subject entering them is able to do so with out maximizing the stretchy material. This is not intended to be offensive to bigger boned people( last time i checked im pretty big boned my self so this applies to me too). The purpose of the material is to make clothing more comfortable and flexible, not to be justification to purchase clothing at a smaller size. Also this stretchy material is not a magic cloak from a harry potter movie that makes your extra lumps and humps(black eyed peas) invisible. Its all still there and no one wants to see it. Guys, stetch shirts dont make you look muscular either, muscles make you look muscular.




2)Words on Butts:
Girls, im glad that you like to "Cheer," or went to "Myrtle Beach," or think you are "Hot Stuff," or even shop at "Hollister," but why do you insist on telling me about it on your butt? I know this is somewhat crude language but it needs to be addressed. We men have a hard enough time keeping our eyes where they should be without having to avert these walking bill boards written on a 14 yr old backdrop. That's just not cool. But what's worse than that is when the backdrop is not so easy on the eyes. Some back drops dont need to bring any extra attention to themselves. And chances are if the background for these mini billboards(or not so mini in some cases) is not appealing then neither are the legs that they come from. Thus resulting in a bad memory altogether. So ladies, no matter what response your backdrop will bring; appretiation or gag reflux...either way, just leave those cute little Word Butt shorts on the shelf.



3) Middle Aged Makeover:
Mamm, Im sorry but that shirt has an age limit on it. If it has cutsy words or phrases written on the front with sparkles and sleeve rings then you cant purchase it unless you are under 27yrs old. There is nothing like seeing a 47 yr old woman try to dress like she is 15. Unless your name is Sheryl Crow then just stick with the "mom jeans" and the sweater vest. And men, you are not fooling anyone with those carpenter/cargo jeans and that American Eagle shirt and your nike shoxs. Your face is old. You cant hide that. First of all carpenter/cargo jeans are out of style so you are just telling us that you are attempting cool and your pants are saying otherwise. Just go to your local golf pro shop and buy nice slacks and polos...its gonna cost you but you should be able to afford it by now.

posted by hansen @ 12:46 PM 17 comments