Do you want fries with that?
I love eating out...Its how i relax most times...i could cook for myself and do occasionally but it's so much more convenient to just have some one else cook for me. Yeah you pay for it but to me its worth it. I love endless options of food and drink...however there is really only one drink option and that is sweet tea. (on that note, i'll just say that my dad and i have adopted a new policy. if i get to a restaurant in the south and they don't serve sweet tea, i just look at them like they have something wrong with them and walk out...arron tippon(thanks sj) said, "you've got to stand for something or you'll fall for anything)
As much a i love dining out i have found that some things in the restaurant/dessert/coffee buiss tend to urk me just a little...
1) Starbucks
something is wrong when you walk in a place and there is a guy at the door handing out little "starbucks for dummies" workbooks before you even get in line. I feel like i just walked into a room full of women talking about types of wedding dresses or place settings...its another language to me. Everyone in front of me is ordering some kinda moka choka latte chi frapo crapo and im seriously debating saying, " ill have one of those as well" just so i don't look like an idiot. It may wind up tasting like horse pee but at least i will fit in for the moment. I get up there and say, " i'll have a medium coffee." I swear its like someone just stopped the record and everyone in the place is like, "what did he just say", "just coffee?" They 17 yr old kid looks at me like i just cussed his grandma..."thats it?" the kid turns back to the coffee scientist who is rubbing his hands together waiting on another creation and say, "one plain coffee VEINTE" and then they all look at me like you should have known that its called veinte...how dare you not use our stupid coffee terminology and how dare you just get a plain coffee. I will say that its a good cup of joe but im debating if its worth the degrading treatment that i get and apparently deserve.
2)mainline restaurants( long horn, out back, chilies, all the same)
Most of these places have great food. Always coming out with a new dish for my dining pleasure. But why do they all insist on ruining someone's birthday and my meal with those not so catching birthday jingles? 1. if i wanted the whole staff at longhorn to celebrate my birthday with me you would have gotten an invitation. 2. i know how much they hate doing it so you think im gonna eat that slice of birthday cheesecake that everyone collectively spat in before you carted it out to me..? 3. just tell me that your restaurant wishes me a happy birthday...you don't have to sing it, dance it, or scream it to me.
3)coldstone marble slab icecream
i know that just the name of this is making some of us salivate. it is good, no doubt. but can i just say that there gets to be a point where one can have too many options. there are like 200 flavors with 300 toppings. if you used your old combinations trig. math that we all forgot in highschool we would realize that the possibility of combinations is almost endless. I like the idea of a fresh icecream mixed with something right before my eyes but please narrow down the playing field a little. I have stood in those places forever just staring at the wall of wonder. To make it worse, they too have come up with their own size naming system like starbucks: Like it, Love it, and Gotta Have it. i think that is supposed to mean; small medium and large. Why? i don't get the logic. i finally make a desicion on a ice cream that looks good to me after racking my brain forever and decided that i would "like" some strawberry cheesecake. But what if i Gotta have a small helping of this treat? or what if i would Love a lot of it? those size names do not always fit and make my entire experience even more confusing. Small medium and large have worked great for many years...there is not need to rename the system.
4)Ci Ci's Pizza
"HI, WELCOME TO Ci Ci'S" I appreciate your enthusiasm and excitement on my arrival but please don't yell at me when i walk in your store. They might as well just say, " Hi welcome Hell Hell" (a place not a cuss word ) because thats what im gonna be in for the next 45 min. with all this yelling. I just want some pizza for 3 dollars, not a headache from your yelling at me and everyone that comes in after me. Oh and keep the spinach pizza coming!
5) Fast Food Drive Through
im not a big fan of the value meals. i feel like im already eating the worst thing i could possibly put in my body so why make it worse with fries and a soft drink. So im driving through the other day and get the normal scratchy uncomprehendable voice, "welcome to hardees may i take your order?" yes i would like just one grilled chicken sandwitch. "Would you like anything else with that sir?" no, just ONE grilled chicken sandwitch. "Sir would you like to make that a combo?" ok so at this point i thought i had made it real clear that all i wanted was ONE grilled chiken sandwitch. if i would have wanted the combo i can read well enough to see it and order it. so i say NO, JUST ONE GRILLED CHICKEN SANDWICH AS I HAVE SAID 3 TIMES. "Please drive around"....in a very snappy tone. I know that my ONE grilled chicken sanwitch is prob. thrown on the floor after my last comment. Do they make a huge commision on selling me the value meal? Does someone have their kids and family held hostage and they must sell that value meal in order to ever see the family again? One would think, given they way they push their fast food agenda on me every time.
posted by hansen @ 9:18 AM
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